Gone

Shivers run
up and down, up and down
Cold grows closer, closer
and even closer still
Rampant imaginations run free,
back and forth and back again
Dreaming things that never lie,
never die, will never go away
Leaving all behind in a hateful
wake of insanity
Lost never to return to the place
they once called home
They are now and always will be
Gone.

Here's the first thing you'll ever read written by me. Enjoy.

Peace and love, y'all
~E.

Upcoming... no, don't get excited

Hello. For all my blog fans out there, if there are any, I've decided to put up some of my dark poetry and flash fiction that I'm not hoping to publish for your reading pleasure. No, not in this post. But... stay tuned. They're coming... soon.

I've been gone a while, so let's catch up, huh? I've completed a few more stories, which I now no longer have. That'll teach me not to back up my files, huh? Thankfully, I had my important works backed up, so no big thing. I can always write more. It's late and I'm tired, but I wanted to update. Soooo, for now...

Peace and love, y'all
~E.

Reconsidering publication... maybe

Times are hard. I need to get my ass in gear and start subbing some work out. I really need to.

I'm not sure if I will... yet.

I feel like I'm grasping at straws. The horror magazines I know of probably wouldn't take my hack work. I need a paying market. I think my work is worth less than any paying market will offer.

What to do?

Fuck if I know.

I've never published before. I say it a lot, but I'm not ashamed of being unpublished. It's even in my blog title. You know what you get when you get here. Not a pro, not even semi-pro. Not even sure of myself.

Maybe that's the problem.

For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, well, I'm talking about being scared. Should I be scared? Yes, I should.

I have an acquaintance on a WD who is a published author. He recently told me that enjoys reading my work. That's quite a compliment.

I have another friend who also enjoys my work. (She's read my novels and several shorter works) She is an unpublished writer as well. She tells me I have natural talent.

And yet another on AW who wrote a story because mine gave her a spark. That's something I felt very touched by. It's usually only published authors who give that kind of inspiration to a reader.

I'd like to believe these people... but I can't.

I've been told by another that my work was unprofessional, not suitable for any paying venue anywhere, and that my writing construction was terribly amateurish. This, all from one person. And for the life of me, I can't get her comments out of my head. It makes me hesitate.

Why?

Because I feel that my writing isn't suitable for a paying venue. I feel that it's unprofessional and amateurish. And I don't know how to fix that. Because I really do feel that way.

So, I'm thinking about a venture out. I might try to shop some of my short stories around. If no one wants them, then I'll have my answer. I'll know what I need to do.

Learn.

Peace and love, y'all
~E.

The ups and downs of writing *gasp* Horror

I enjoy what I write. I always have. Hearing people say "Oh my god, you write horror?" in just that way makes me giggle.

I can write some sick, twisted stuff. I can. For that matter, anyone can. Everyone has a little psycho within. I just have a lot.

Does that mean I'm weird? Yes. Yes it sure does. And know what? I like my weird.

Does that mean I'm sick? Perhaps. Perhaps not. I'm not telling you.

I love writing enough to stick it out, no matter who laughs at me, says I'm not a writer until I'm published, says my work is shit. So what? I'd rather sit all day, write shit and enjoy myself than have a bunch of poky old academic types tell me what's wrong with my work simply because it's genre fiction. Don't like it? Don't read it, shit for brains.

I write Sci-Fi as well, but not as much. My sci-fi attempts come out scarier than sci-fi is supposed to be.

Wonder when speculative horror will become a sub-genre? Hmm...

Love those things that make me go "Hmm."

Sci-Fi and Horror fans are much the same audience, though not all members of one or the other like both. Me? I like it all, mwahahahahaha.

I've been told that "People only write horror because they can't manage anything better." Boy, was that the wrong thing to say to me.

Now, simply because a person is a horror writer does not mean we are stupid. We are not.

Koontz. Stupid?

King. Ignorant?

Lovecraft. Imbecile?

Poe. Hack?

I think NOT!

For those who like to horror bash, chew on this, amigo.

What are your nightmares? Why do you feel creeped out when you are alone? Why do you ride a roller coaster? Why do you go in the haunted house at Halloween? Why do you watch scary movies? Why do you always feel like you are being watched?

That's your horror trying to come out, fuckstick.

On a lighter, happier note, I've recently bashed out a short story I'm proud of. It's on Absolute Write, part of the April Prompt. Met some good people on there and they've helped me a lot in the short time I've known them. Haggis, Aggy B., Cranky, Kerr, Donkey, Soapdish, IdiotsRUs, CACTUSWENDY, dgiharris, Linda Adams, y'all are great. Here's to you.

My friend and fellow writer, Angel Rose Darke, has been helping me with grammar and the finer points of syntax and I owe a lot to her. She's a gem. Without her, my novel THE SPIDER would be full of extra apostrophes and commas and repeated words.

I have a thing for apostrophes and commas. My fingers must like to type them or something.

So, why do I write horror?

Because I love to be scared and to scare people. Because I want people to go "Oh my GOD!" when they read something I've written. Because I love being able to get inside people's heads and make them check their locks. Because all the fat fucks out there that like to tell me I shouldn't, can't, dear God, not horror! At least I know I'm an accomplished, talentless, professionless hack. I've written a book or two. They're not great, but they're mine. What have you done today, hmm?

Basically, what I'm saying is this. You don't have to like what I do. You don't have to read it. But, mother fucker, you WILL respect it. At least I'm trying to hone my skills and become better. Would you rather I give up? I bet you would, cause then you'd be right. I would be nothing.

Just...

Like...

You.

Now, those who love horror and sci-fi as much as I do will appreciate the fact that I'm trying. And for those that do, you have my eternal gratitude.

That's enough rant, for now. I'm happy again and I feel vindicated. So, now I can finally say and mean...

Peace and love, y'all.
~E.